The Lunatics Really Are Running the Asylum Now
First published: Watson R (2025) The Lunatics Really Are Running the Asylum Now The New Conservative 10 September
The Lunatics Really Are Running the Asylum Now
I was only half listening to the news at the end of the week, and over the weekend, preoccupied as I was with a five-hour drive to Edinburgh. I’d have followed it closely on the radio in the car but as soon as I put it on Mrs Watson, who likes to drive or be driven without any ‘babble’, asks if there is something I am specifically listening to which my response is invariably “clearly not and no longer” and off it goes. It would make no difference if I said “yes”.
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So, only able to pick up the occasional snippets, I clearly misheard one aspect of the reshuffle caused by the departure of serial house purchaser and persistent tax avoider Angela Rayner. I thought I heard that Shamima Begum had been appointed Home Secretary. This kept me amused for a few miles until we swapped places at the wheel and I could check my phone. Turns out that it was even worse. Shabana Mahmood had been appointed as Home Secretary.
I had been wondering what policies an air-headed ISIS pinup girl could possibly enact. Given her treatment at the hands of the medieval Islamic savages while she acted as a comfort girl for them, there was an outside chance that she might be even tougher on our own enemy within, who we seem unable or unwilling to fight on the beaches, than a succession of Home Secretaries to date. Surely, she has had the Muslimness shagged right out of her; certainly, it looks that way when you see her.
But Shabana Mahmood has brains, experience and is a Muslim for whom – as she has declared – her faith comes first. If her faith comes first then her values must be completely at odds with our British values of freedom, tolerance and equality (and diversity) as none of these things are visible in Muslim societies. Richard North asks in TCW Defending Freedom “How can a devout Muslim safeguard security and freedoms built on Western values?” Zia Yusuf, head of Reform’s DOGE, has apparently caught her taking exception to “white, males” holding the English flag. She hates us and she hates the St George’s flag.
Of course, the conclusion is that she can’t safeguard security and freedoms built on Western values. She cannot possibly defend values in which she does not believe. As a practising Roman Catholic, I hate our country. To be more specific, I hate what we have become, I hate our government and I hate the woke values that dominate our policies and institutions. But as a Christian, I am exhorted – by none other than Jesus Himself – to render unto Caesar and to love my enemy.
I interpret that as doing all I am permitted to do, within the law, to shine a spotlight and effect change wherever I have the necessary influence. Ms Mahmood has no such restraints emanating from her religion – which “comes first”. Islam is about discrimination against women, dominance over and death to infidels and the implementation of Sharia law. Correct me if I am wrong.
I don’t envisage Shabana Mahmood entering the House of Commons with an AK-47 and spraying her fellow legislators with bullets. But her presence as a prominent Muslim in such a prominent position without the apparent will to demonstrate her patriotism, gives power to the elbows of those who may. She claims that she will be tough on illegal migrants. Pull the other one Shabana. Possibly encouraged by the news that she had been appointed we ‘welcomed’ over 1000 illegal migrants to our southeastern shores on Saturday.
Further down the reshuffle kerfuffle, Net Zero Brains Ed Miliband was asked to step down but refused to go. Did I read that correctly? “Asked” and “refused”. Starmer’s failure to remove one of the most unpopular and frankly ridiculous members of his government speaks volumes about his leadership skills. Non-existent. I’ll bet Ange is kicking herself now, she should have waited to be asked to resign…and refused.
Ange’s departure has left a vacuum where a black hole already existed. That of the meaningless and pointless position of Deputy Leader of the Labour Party. It seems to be an assumption that the replacement will be a woman. Take a look at the potential candidates – a peek is about all you’ll manage – and consider the possibilities. Sir Keir’s alleged penchant for Ukrainian rent boys may, in part, be explained by the women with whom he surrounds himself. Mrs Starmer clearly wants nothing to do with him.
But every cloud. The reshuffle brings Brain of Britain David Lammy back in the spotlight as Deputy Prime Minister. This raises the possibility that we will see him in action, deputising for the Prime Minister, at PMQs. The extent of his ignorance is legendary. His performance on Mastermind proved that he was anything but. More recently he had to report himself to the Environment Agency for fishing without a licence. We may never have known except that he decided to do this with the US Vice-President JD Vance. Stupid or what?
Starmer probably thinks that he has saved the day with this reshuffle. But I think he will find otherwise when we go to the polls. He may even be ousted long before a general election if some Labour MPS have any sway over the party. Meantime, unrestrained by any straitjackets – physical or metaphorical – the lunatics are still firmly in charge of the asylum.
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